What I’d like to say here today may seem self-serving, given that I have neglected my blog for months, have failed to send the newsletters to my email list that I promised myself I would send, and I’m in a bit of a “health and fitness” rut. And given that I recently sobbed to my poor, unsuspecting sister-in-law Labor Day weekend about how overwhelmed I was feeling and how sucky it was that I was heading back to such an uncertain reality after a summer of living in a magical bubble, often with my head in the sand…
But, self-serving or not, I’m saying it anyway: It’s ok if it takes time. It’s ok if your journey takes time…whatever your journey is.
Sidenote: every time I hear or say “journey” I picture another of my sisters-in-law doing her impression of Alexis from Schitt’s Creek and it brings a smile to my face. I think her impression is even better than the real thing. (I’m blessed with many sisters-in-law, each more amazing than the next) So bear with me on the touchy-feely “journey” word…
Anyway, back to your journey…whether it’s a weight loss journey or a career journey or a coming to terms with childhood trauma journey or a getting sober journey or a finding love journey or a loving yourself journey or whatever kind of journey you’re on – it’s ok if it takes time.
It takes time…Sometimes it feels like it’s taking forever…
As much of a mess as I am in some areas right now- stealing mini Starbursts from my daughter (really, not having to unwrap them makes Starbursts much more dangerous and the minis are just delightful, somehow better than their bigger counterparts), spontaneously crying upon seeing little kids in masks, revealing TMI to acquaintances, and sporting an extra 10 pounds of fluff that keeps anything from fitting comfortably- in some ways I feel more at peace and more comfortable with myself than ever.
I attribute this partially to age and the wisdom that comes with it (I’ve been waiting for this since 40, I’m a little pissed it took an extra 5 years- isn’t the magic of being a woman supposed to start at 40? Oprah?) and partially to a fantastic new guru I’m obsessed with- Tama Kieves. And partially to the fact that I’ve been at this “loving yourself” and “figuring shit out” and “what meaningful things do I want to do with my life?” and “I guess this is what a mid-life crisis is?” journey for so freaking long.
But whatever is responsible for this inner peace I’m grateful for it…
Here are some thoughts that have helped carve the path here…
The right direction can take a while.
It’s worth it.
It’s the right direction.
-Tama Kieves
Ok, so it’s taking a while. It will be worth it when you get there because it will be where you’re meant to be. Don’t rush it or half-ass it to get close to where you want to be…
There’s also a divine timing,
when something just takes hold as it has not done before.
-Tama Kieves
You don’t have to follow someone else’s formula. I felt such pressure to do things that I was losing sight of what it was supposed to be all about anyway. So stop comparing yourself, stop trying to fit yourself into someone else’s model of what works, and just love yourself. It’s hard not to feel bad about yourself when it’s taking for-freaking-ever to meet goals. Now I’m feeling ok with where I’m at; I know where I’m at now will help me get where I’m meant to be…
What if you’re not stuck?
What if you’re not adrift?
What if you’re supposed to be right here in the dead center of it all for reasons you can’t see yet?
-Tama Kieves
Maybe this uncertainty I’ve been swimming in the last few years will come in handy somewhere on down the road…
See it with a little more love, a little less judgment…
The whole love thing sounds too good and too simple and too sentimental and sappy but it’s true. And if you keep thinking about it sinks in. It’s like drinking the kool-aid but in a good way. Like drinking the vitamin-infused lemon water.
When we make an effort to see things differently, it works. It might take a while, longer than we’d like, but it works.
So be patient with yourself and be kind to yourself. Don’t give up. Know that if you haven’t reached your destination yet, it’s ok. No matter how long it takes, stay on your journey. The journey is really what it’s all about.
That doesn’t mean we can’t all use some tough love and a good swift kick in the pants every now and again. Like I could use someone to slap those Starbursts out of my hand and right now I’m shaking myself and feeling like it’s time to channel my inner badass and get after my goals.
But the lovingness behind the grit and the toughness is still there. It’s toughness coming from a place of love.
What journey are you thinking about most these days? I’d love to hear from you! You can comment here, email me mary@stayathomefit.com, or find me on Facebook and Instagram. My Facebook journey is stronger than my Instagram journey, FYI…
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