I’ll be honest…I was a big Mel Robbins fan before I read this book. I loved her first book The 5 Second Rule, I loved her little motivational videos on Facebook and Instagram, I loved her quotes. But when I first heard about this book I was skeptical. The High 5 Habit? I’m not really a big high-fiving kinda person, and the whole concept seemed like a bit of a stretch and a whole lot of corny-ness. For lack of a better word. But The High 5 Habit is really good…anecdotal and scientific and motivating and inspiring and hopeful and comforting all in an easy-to-read book.
Skip it, Buy it, Borrow it? Definitely buy it. My copy is littered with post-its and things I’ve underlined. And even if you’re not quite the personal development book nerd I am, I think it’s a book you’ll want to come back to. There are chapters I want to share with loved ones- even if I have to trick them or bribe them into it!
My #1 Takeaway
The thing that stood out to me the most in this book was what I learned about the Reticular Activating System, a kind of filter in your brain that can get filled up with stuff but can also be cleaned out and reprogrammed.
“I call it a filter, because negative experiences tend to get stuck in the RAS, but technically it is a live network of neurons that sits like a hairnet over your brain. When your RAS is jammed with thoughts, beliefs, and experiences from your past, you stay stuck in the past. That’s why you keep repeating the same mistakes, thinking the same negative thoughts, and living in the echo chamber of your mind.” (p. 74)
I don’t think I could do the explanation justice, but it is worth learning about for sure. Your RAS can stay stuck in negative thought patterns and beliefs, or you can actively work to change it, thereby making it easier to make positive changes in your life.
Some of my favorite quotes from the book…
One of the most important revelations you can ever have is that your life and your happiness begins and ends inside your own mind. what you say to yourself, how you treat yourself, and the thoughts that run on repeat are everything.
When you focus on what’s wrong, you will never change.
Hating your body, your past, or yourself won’t motivate you.
You have to stand face-to-face with that part of you that you hate, forgive yourself for the hurt you’ve caused (especially to yourself), and do the work to become a better you. It’s the only way to create the self-respect and build the self-esteem that you desire.
There ARE do-overs in life. You get one every single morning when you wake up, look in the mirror, and decide who you are going to be today. You can choose. You can change. You can’t go back in time but you can have your own back as you use the time you have to take control, change your behavior, and create a new chapter that makes you proud.
…the faster you put yourself first, the faster you teach everyone around you how to do it too.
…there is something meant for you that you will only find when you allow that dream to pull you through your fears.
…having the courage to pursue your dreams is way more important than actually achieving them.
If you want a new future, act like it. No matter how scared you are, just start.
When you are able to trust that all your hard work is leading you somewhere, you will create miracles in your life.
Feeling fear is normal. It’s what you do the moment after you feel the fear that makes a difference.
Need some practical advice?
My favorite thing about this book is that it gives you practical, how-to advice. It even includes a downloadable journal to walk you through making this habit part of your life and using its insight to make positive changes. Want to finally lose the weight, stick with the exercise program, change the job, meet the guy, forgive the person, do the thing? This book can help.
I keep forgetting to high-five myself, but I am being kinder to myself. I am looking for what I’m doing right instead of dwelling on what I’ve done wrong. And I’m working on cleaning out the lint from my filter- I have lots of lint in there, maybe some gum and chapstick too- and looking for new evidence of all that is possible for me.
Where could you use a little high five? What kind of lint is stuck in your dryer filter? I’d love to hear from you! Please comment here or email me at mary@stayathomefit.com or find me on Facebook and Instagram.
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